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It started when #stevethehuman showed up on the night watch. Commissar Jenkins had not been seen for awhile, but #stevethehuman was an ok guy. Jenkins was a tool. Commissar Jenkins had executed #stevethehuman the night before for heresy, and him coming back clearly meant he was a Saint for his unit.
#stevethehuman told them the Orks were going to flank after he “got lost taking a letter P as all flesh bags do with letters”. He had stumbled across their camp and spotted the surprise flank being positioned. He said he had some “normal Mechanicus sanctioned murder robots” that were his friends that could help. This was well received.
Several hours later, as the guardsmen crept up in the night, a flare was launched over their dune. An Ork Stompa opened fire and hammered most of the full unit of Flayed ones. #stevethehuman remained standing, much to the guardsmen’s relief. He was such a nice guy. The Veterans hunkered down in place, losing a few to stray fire and rounds that were incoming. A green tide that stretched as far as the eye could see in the dark came surging forward. Killa Kans stomped forward with a Deff Dread, and a Battle Wagon rocked forward. The Stompa suffered some critical engine failure and had to remain stationary.
The lone Leman Russ Battle Tank kicked on its spot light and turned it towards the Killa Kans, but some obstructing crates foiled its shot, crippling just one of them. The guardsmen returned fire as well, picking off odd targets while their Rough Riders carefully got into striking position. Their new Mechanicus allies seemed to be struggling. Most of the Not Flayed Ones stayed dead, the Not Canoptek Doom Stalkers completely failed to hit the Killa Kans, and the Not Necron Warriors failed to do anything except die and stay dead as well. #stevethehuman’s friends must be some form of new experimental prototype. The Not Flayed Ones were able to obliterate some Ork Kommandoz though.
Daylight fully settled in the valley, and the guardsmen realized that maybe #stevethehuman was friends with tech heresy, but the battle was already to far pitched to try and ask him. Also, #stevethehuman was getting pummeled by the Stompa again, but he got up with a few of his friends. The Ork Boyz then charged, lead by their Warboss. Again, #stevethehuman went down, but he got better. The rest of the gunline was strafed with intense dakka fire. Multiple Rokkits hit the Not Canoptek Doom Stalkers again, knocking one over despite its advanced shielding. A unit of Guardsmen were charged, but the Commissar cut down the Nob Boss in a duel and the Sergeant slew several with his Chainsword. They held the line!
The Guardsmen rallied to #stevethehuman’s resilience, pouring intense las fire into the Orks. many of them were cut down by the intense and accurate las fire that proved their marksmanship. The Commissar and Sergeant missed with their pistols, but cut down several more Orks before they had a chance to fight back! The Company Command Squad and Platoon Command Squad charged into the fight, but completely failed to kill more then a single Ork. The Rough Riders roared in on their motorbikes on both flanks. The West Flank saw a sad assortment of Grots get burned to a crisp by Flamers and improvised claymore mines on a stick. The ones on the East started laying plasma and las fire into some Orks that had not got to the battle line yet. #stevethehuman was cut down again, after killing some Orks, but he stood up again! Trazyn was slain, but the Warboss was wounded.
Sadly, this is where we had to stop for time restraints and bad weather. Most important take aways from this game was that #stevethehuman is a friend of the Guard and that not a single Ork unit felt bad! We are really excited that the reboot of the original Ork Codex performed so well and are eager to play test more! I hope you all been good ‘ittle grots this ‘ear!
Each time Trazyn dies, he can steal a host body nearby on a 2+. Unless you are Alex.
Alternate 40k Rules 